Sugar, Spice, and more Spice
by TenyumeKasumi
Summary: [Prompt: Spicing up the relationship in the bedroom] There was a consequence to leaving sugary snacks all over the place, and an elven Inquisitor was going to make sure Solas knew exactly about this consequence.


This was getting a bit too far.

Stomping her way down the main hall of Skyhold as she made her way to the rotunda, Niernen Lavellan fumed. This was the third time this week she had sat at her desk only discover an unpleasant surprise crawling over the surface of her workspace, and she was not about to tolerate it for another day.

"Solas?" she called, popping her head into the rotunda. Solas glanced up at her from one of his sketchpads, a large one that dominated the overencumbered table. His slate blue eyes reflected curious surprise.

" _Vhenan_? Is there something you need?" he asked, lowering his charcoal stick.

"Just a word, if you have the time."

"Of course," he said, rising to his feet. She caught a glimpse of grey outlines sketched with a light hand and gradient undertones of solid black and smudged ash grey before he flipped the pad closed. He plodded over to her, trying to dust the charcoal residue from his fingers, but only succeeded in smudging it even more.

Not mincing words, she cut straight to the point. "Solas, I'm going to have to ask you not to eat any more of those frilly cakes in our room."

He quirked an eyebrow at her. "I am afraid I have not the slightest idea as to what you are talking about."

"I think you know _perfectly_ well what I'm talking about," she countered, narrowing her eyes.

"Personally speaking, I do not see a problem with my consumption of cake in your room as long as I confine it to the desk, which I have dutifully done."

"Confine it where you like, there are still _ants_ , Solas."

Solas almost laughed, covering his "Ha!" of mirth with a cough. "A-Ants, you say?"

Her beautiful violet eyes narrowed further. "Is that supposed to be something _funny_?"

"No, no, nothing! I simply … Of all the things you never got angry at, you are upset over a few minuscule insects?"

"These are ANTS, Solas! They get under your clothes, they bite, they itch, they ruin your food, and they always come when there are irresponsible eaters among us!"

"Are you suggesting I leave _crumbs_ , _vhenan_?"

"I am not suggesting it — I am declaring it."

There was a momentary pause. Touché. "Sera steals them if I keep them out here."

Niernen released a long, drawn out sigh, eyes travelling heavenward. "Couldn't you just … eat them somewhere else where she won't get at them?"

"Niernen, think. Is there any place in Skyhold where Sera cannot or will not get to?"

"You could take them outside Skyhold—"

"I doubt that will work, they come in boxes of six at a time."

She threw her hands up in the air. "Eat them all at once then!"

A conniving smile teased at the corners of his mouth, slate blue eyes glinting. " _Vhenan_ , are you suggesting I am gluttonous enough to devour six whole cakes by myself in one sitting?"

She continued as if he hadn't spoken. "—or just go to Val Royeaux instead of ordering them from the castle—"

"But it is a terrible hassle. And besides, what if you needed me and I am off on a frilly cake expedition in the capital of Orlais?"

Crossing her arms in a huff, she glared at him like a pet owner would with a misbehaving puppy. "Solas," she growled, for lack of a better response. " _Ants._ "

Solas conceded with a chuckle, prying her hands from her body to uncross her arms. He held her left hand in his right, running his thumb over the back of her palm and leaving a smear of stormy grey over her skin. "If I solve our ant problem, will I be allowed to keep my cakes?"

" _If_ you solve the ant problem, Solas. This isn't something you can just snap your fingers and—"

"Consider it done."

A silence followed the declaration. Niernen stared up at him with those crystalline violet eyes she was so famous for, and he reached up a hand to cup her cheek with a light caress, his thumb leaving another streak of charcoal in its wake. She turned her accusing gaze to the floor, her glare losing its fire as she mumbled a grudging grumble of, "I better not see any of those _vermin_ tomorrow morning."

He couldn't help the victorious grin that stretched across his face. "I promise you will not, _ma vhenan_ ,"

Another short silence, followed by, "Your hands are dirty."

"So they are," he agreed, his remaining hand rising and pressing against her other cheek. "But I do not hear any complaints from you."

The blood rushed to her face, and she was sure he could feel the heat of her blush in his palms. "It's just charcoal," she said, leaning forward and wrapping her arms around his torso, resting her cheek against his tunic and nuzzling the soft material.

"... What are you doing?" he asked her as she continued , rubbing her other cheek up against him.

"Returning the favour," she answered, flashing him a grin as she pulled away to reveal a large blotch of charcoal on the collarbone of his tunic. Before he could exact revenge, she turned tail and stalked out of the rotunda, head held high as if her face didn't currently resemble qunari vitaar. A moment of silence followed after the slam of the heavy wooden door, then a quiet chuckle.

He would have to change before visiting the ambassador, then.

The shipment of Antivan spices arrived soon enough, and Solas carried the entire box of them up to the Inquisitor's quarters much to Josephine's bewilderment. The shipments of spices soon became a regular thing, and Josephine developed a habit of ordering them at the beginning of every month. Box after box disappeared into the Inquisitor's quarters and never re-emerged, their fates a mystery to all at Skyhold, though the heavy scent of cinnamon clung to the Inquisitor and Solas everywhere they went.

Niernen was never heard complaining of ants ever again.

* * *

 **A/N:** So I was looking at an OTP prompt list on Tumblr and this first one was 'Spicing up the relationship in the bedroom.' I cheated and used actual spices — placing sticks of cinnamon can apparently help deter ants from gathering at that area. I've never actually tried this myself though, so I can't say if it works. xD


End file.
